Sometimes I Want To Feel Used

well the past 3 times I've tried to write this exact post..Well not exact but I tried..It got deleted randomly..And I cant copy it for some strange reason..So here we go agian.im really losing momentum now.
these past few days have been rather uneventful..Aside from some new clothes not too much had taken place...The "issue" still remains unsolved...For how much longer? I'm not quite sure. Am I exceedingly concerned? Hardly.
have you ever told someone something and upon hearing there reaction wished you had kept it to yourself? Have you ever just put yourself out there, your rawest emotions..The core of your being..Only to have it treated as though it were some disease? How did that make you feel? How are you supposed to feel...Would it make you think your emotions are not valid or not considered healthy? Would you ever trust your emotions with another person after that? Or would all those things just be suppressed and end up in a hidden crevice in your mind and become silenced and still? And if you did that..Would they one day come out in a rage and hurt you even more so than you would have been had you just said something to being with? Who knows..Maybe I'm not meant to know...