My Hand Is Three Times Its Regular Size, And It Never Felt So Good

Today I've had enough. I have come across the last spider...I can't do it anymore. For the past month I have been seeing, on a daily basis almost, giant spiders in my room..I'm not talking ones the size of a nickel..I'm talking BIG. And on an almost regular basis I wake up with spider bites on me..my legs, my arm..where ever really.
But when I see them its usually around on the floor somewhere.
Today I'm sitting in my bed I turn towards the pillow to my left and BAM huge spider sitting on my pillow. I ran for the vacuum cleaner, made a ton of noise that woke my younger cousins up who ended up coming down to my room to watch the action. I tried to get it with the vacuum..but it got away and I caught up to it and I'm pretty sure I got it. but in the process the vacuum sucked up my favorite headscarf that I wear all the time.
So Ive had enough.
I'm sleeping on the couch.

Way Back When They Used To Call Me George

In the sixth grade, well honestly my whole life would probably be more accurate, I was considered a distraction to other students. So to get down to it, I talked too much. I was friends with and would talk to anyone and everyone so yeah after years of it the teachers had had enough.
The desk arrangement in that class was simple rows so they moved my desk to the back and to the far left of the room, slightly removed from the rows.
No big deal, I just found I had to talk slightly louder to the person next to me.
So my desk was removed even farther left and a little bit up.
I somehow managed to be a distraction.
Then out came the tri-fold. Those tall cardboard tri-folds. It went around my desk and the opening was behind me a little past my seat. There was a little slit in the shape of a semi-circle on the front that I could just pop out when the teacher was instructing and put back up when she was done. It was three times taller than I was.
I sat in a box on the far left of the class.
Now I've got to stress that I wasn't really a bad kid. I was always nice and pleasant an did well in class. It was just that I talked to much
After a few months in the box my teacher took me aside during class one day and said that I've been much better and if I would like I could now move my desk back in the row and get rid of the box. I thought about it but decided that I liked the box and I ended up sitting there until the end of the year. It was just that I loved to just sit there and I could day dream or sleep or color and no one would really know and I liked being alone. Plus I could always tell when someone was about to peak around my box so I'd have a backup in case.
But having a substitute teacher was always the best because they just didn't get it. I'm sure it must have been odd to walk in and find a large box in the room where one child in particular sits.
After that year ended we moved to a new house where I got my own room. And since then my room has been my box.

Come And Crawl Into My Heart, Its Empty In There

On really nice summer nights and even on the not- so- nice nights I wish I knew someone who would want to walk somewhere where we can lay on our backs...stare at the sky and talk and dream.
But I wouldn't want to talk about just anything...I would want to talk about life and spirituality and love and pain. And I would explain how I feel and they would tell me their feelings but they would be so much different than mine...and trying to understand them always brings clarity upon your own situations.
I used to have moments like that.
Now all those people are gone and I'm here still wanting that same feeling.
It was that one summer with all the early mornings when it seemed like no one was awake yet. And we would eventually find our way to the park and just enjoy it...enjoy the sun and the birds and the fresh air and the silence.
On a bench with my face turned skywards and you sitting right beside me, you'd talk and I would listen and share and I swear I learned more about you in those moments than I could have in a lifetime.
But life always changes and never remains still. And I don't know where you are and I'm sure those moments were just another day to you but for a while there I was really content.

Its Time To Push The Limits

Luck, if you believe in such a thing, seems so strange to me.
I don't understand how some people get all the "luck" and some get left with none. And is this luck randomly handed out by the cosmos to whomever or is it selected on the basis of who needs what and when.
Or is it in one way or another gods doing? Is luck gods way of showing you he's helping your poor ass, or rewarding you for something? I used to be realy hard on luck, it never came my way the first 2/3 of my life was hard, too much to hold on such small shoulders, but I never really knew or questioned why. So maybe this is his way of making it up to you for all the shitty stuff from before?
Either way, I'll take what I can get and be thankful.

Sitting At The Bottom And Things Are Looking Up

You will never know happiness to its full extent until you have hit rock bottom.
From the bottom you can see it all more clearly...take a step back and take in the view, the fall. When there is no where left to go but up, you will climb with more determination then you could ever imagine. For you will then know what the edge of hell is like , and you will know that that is a place you never wish to return.

The same object can look so different from the top then it does from the bottom.
Life and any situation in it always reminds me of this. We as people are all standing at different places some of us are sitting on the top while others are still making their way up and there's the forgotten who are still at the bottom, and if a handful of those people were to come upon the same object/situation they would all view it and react to it in accordance to where they stand and we never can really understand people because were just not at the same place.
I don't want to be in this place anymore.